The Big D and Clive Koopa interview Iggy
by Clive Koopa
Summary: My first and only interview submission to Lemmy's Land, which I did with The Big D a few years ago before he dissapeared.


Before the Interview...

Big D- So, seeing as you three can't do a decent job, I'm firing you!

King Dedede, Meta Knight and Waddle Dee- WHAT?!

Big D- And, I'm replacing you!

Someone knocks at the door...

Big D- Come in!

Iggy walks in.

Iggy: Hello Big D!

Big D- Get out.

Iggy- Why?

Big D- You're in my office.

Iggy- So...?

Big D- Can someone deal with him, please!

Waddle Dee kicks Iggy out of the room and shuts the door.

Big D- Thanks! For that, you can stay!

Waddle Dee- Thank you! So, who's interviewing with you?

Big D- Everyone, prepare to meet... CliveKoopa!

CliveKoopa walks through the door.

Clive Koopa: Hey Big D.

Clive sits down on the chair opposite from The Big D.

Big D- So, let's get this party started!

At the Interview studio...

Big D- Welcome to...

Lemmy- Lemmy's Interview Show!

Big D- Today, I've brought a friend ! Please welcome, CliveKoopa!

The audience claps and cheers.

Clive: Thank you everyone, I love you all!

Big D- Our guest audience member is infamous for his machines! Please welcome, Dr Eggman and his partner Metal Sonic!

Dr Eggman- I'm flattered!

Metal- ...

Dr Eggman- Metal Sonic said "Hi."

Big D- Me and CliveKoopa will be interviewing Iggy Koopa!

Iggy- I'm feeling really nervous...

Big D- So Iggy, why did you want to be interviewed?

Iggy: Because I want to show the whole world just how awesome I am!

Big D- You're not awesome.

Iggy- ... You have a cruel sense of humor, don't you?

Big D- How can you jump higher than your brothers and sister?

Iggy- I've been training for the High Jump since I first saw the Koopa Olympics.

Big D- In Mario World, why were you battling Mario on a giant bowl?

Iggy- I was hoping to send him into the lava by charging at him, but he got the better of me...

Clive scowls at the mention of Mario's name

Clive: Ahem, why is your hair green now and why are you so skinny?

Iggy: I'm on a diet , can't you tell?

Clive: (sarcastically) Oh yeah, heh heh heh...

Iggy: As for my hair, well I decided I should change my image a little. I thought it would help me boost my confidence against Mario, plus I just like it.

Big D- What's with the glasses?

Iggy- They trick people into thinking that I'm weak. And... I can't see properly.

Big D- Why were you somewhat insane in NSMBWii?

Iggy- After Mario beat me in Yoshi's Safari, I went insane from the damage that Mario did to my mech. Sadly, that has made a permanent mark on my life.

Big D- Should we go to audience questions?

Clive: Yes, you in seat 45!

Koopa Troopa: Hey, you promised me I would become a general when you took over Giant Land's castle. Why haven't I become one yet?

Iggy: I don't remember promising that. Next...

The Koopa Troopa sits down sadly.

Clive: You in Seat 56, what's your question?

Roy: Yeah, your glasses make you look really weak, why don't you get a pair like mine? My glasses are obviously cooler.

Iggy- I can't see through sunglasses! How can you?

Roy- ... Remind me to pound you when this ends!

Big D- Seat 7!

Gloomtail- Why do you like Chain Chomps?

Iggy- They're fierce, and they like me!

A Chain Chomp eats Iggy's hair.

Iggy- NOOOO! It took months to make it stand !

Big D- Seat 54!

Dry Bones- Why didn't you save us from Mario? Why?!

Iggy- How was I supposed to know that Mario would beat us? I thought I had everything setup, but as always Mario is just a big cheat. We stand no chance against those Stars of his. But don't worry, Mario will be mine next time.

Clive- How do you plan on beating him?

Iggy- I'll use his own powers against him. In fact, Ludwig is already working on a way to give us Koopas the same powers as those Mario Brothers.

Clive- Sounds good, would it work on a regular Koopa Troopa like myself?

Iggy- Ludwig is working on that, and soon, the Mushroom Kingdom will belong to the Koopas.

Big D- I believe that our special guests have questions! Dr Eggman?

Dr Eggman- If you ruled the world, what would you do with it?

Iggy- I'd turn it into a Chain Chomp paradise!

Metal- ...

Dr Eggman- Metal Sonic said... "I want to know if you're fast enough to beat me in a race! Are you?"

Iggy: Yeah, I'll race you anytime. I'm the fastest Koopa around!

Clive: Yes, seat number 77!

Waluigi: What about kart racing?

Iggy: Yeah, I'll beat anyone at kart racing. Me and Lemmy always go racing...

Metal Sonic reconnects his vocal unit so that he can speak.

Metal- Is that so?

Iggy- Yeah! I'm the Kart Racing Champion in Dark Land!

Metal- Here's my proposal. If you beat me in a race around the Mushroom Kingdom, I'll give you unlimited power! So, are you up to it?

Iggy- Yeah!

Big D- A few more questions... Seat 99!

Larry: Why did you steal my method of trying to beat Mario in Super Mario World?

Iggy: You obviously stole my method, I had the idea first. Besides, how was I supposed to know you would have the same idea?

Clive: Okay, seat 15 please, what's your question?

Lemmy: Hey Iggy, when are we going go-karting again?

Iggy: You can take part with me in the next grand prix with Metal Sonic and whoever else dares to enter!

Lemmy: All right. This is going to be a blast!

Big D- Final question! Seat 13!

?- Why did you get rid of your Interview crew?

Big D- Because they couldn't do a decent job!

? is Dr Roo, who left after the first Interview with Badyoyo!

Dr Roo- They miss you. Didn't you know?

Big D- Welcome back, old friend ! Where are the others?

Dr Roo- They were captured by Mario. You should save them...

Big D- Clive, could you takeover while I find my crew?

Clive: Sure thing. You go and show that Mario the meaning of business!

Clive waits for Big D to leave before speaking again.

Clive: So Iggy, how is Ludwig going to let us use the same powers as Mario?

Iggy: Well I don't know the full details, but Ludwig took a sample of Mario's DNA from a time when he was unconscious, and he is researching all of Mario's special powers as well as genetics and stuff. That's all I know for now...

Clive: What does it take to be a great go-kart racer?

Iggy: Loads of experience. I plan on becoming the champion.

Meanwhile, at Peach's Castle...

Mario- So, I heard that you got fired...

Meta Knight- So? What's it got to do with you?

Mario- I have an offer for you... If you destroy The Big D, I'll reward you...

Waddle Dee- No way!

Mario- What if I bribed you with pizza?

Waddle Dee- I'll do it!

Mario- For Meta Knight, would you kill your master for some cookies?

Meta Knight- COOKIES!

King Dedede- And for me...?

Mario- Will smoked fish do?

King Dedede- (in M. Bison's voice) YES! YES!

At the Interview...

Clive: What do you think of Junior?

Iggy: Junior is a big fake. My dad favors him more than any of us and he isn't even a real Koopaling.

Clive: So what is he then?

Iggy: He's a clone, just like those other so-called Baby Bowsers.

Clive: I see. Is it true that you designed the doomship?

Iggy: I helped build the doomship, although most of it was all Ludwig's work. I was Ludwig's main assistant in its design and construction.

Meanwhile, outside Peach's Castle...

Big D is seen running towards the castle. King Dedede, Meta Knight, and Waddle Dee stop him.

Waddle Dee- Sorry, but we've been hired to kill you...

Meta Knight- We won't hold back...

King Dedede- And we won't take bribes!

Big D- Great. Now I'll need backup ...

He rings CliveKoopa on his mobile.

Big D- I hope this works...

Meanwhile back in the Interview room, Clive hears his phone ring.

Clive: Oh great, perfect timing. Who dares ring me in the middle of an Interview?!

Clive looks at his phone to see The Big D calling.

Clive: Oh, it's Big D, I'd better answer this. Hold on a minute, Iggy...

Clive answers the phone.

Clive: Hello Big D, what's up?

Big D- Could you put Dr Eggman on the phone? I really need help here!

Clive: Sure thing, hold on a moment while I put him on. Hey Eggman, can you come down here for a moment? Big D wants to speak to you.

Dr Eggman: I'm coming down now.

Dr Eggman walks down to where Clive and Iggy are sitting and takes the phone from Clive.

Dr Eggman: What is it, Big D? This better be important!

Big D- Eggman, do you still have the Egg Dragoon? (From Sonic Unleashed)

Dr Eggman- Yes. Why do you ask?

Big D- Can I borrow it for a moment?

Dr Eggman- Very well. I'll send it to you via teleport!

Big D- Thank you! While you're here, can you tell CliveKoopa that he gets to ask two more questions before a SHOCKING finale?

Eggman: I'll tell him that and I'll be with you very shortly.

Eggman hangs up and hands the phone back to Clive.

Eggman: Big D says you can ask Iggy two more questions before a big finale.

Clive: A big finale? Huh?

Eggman: Yes, now I must go. I'll catch ya later.

Eggman leaves the studio.

Clive: Okay, well, back to the Interview. Iggy, is it true that you are demented?

Iggy: I wouldn't say I'm demented. That's just a stereotype planted on me. I'm just different, that's all.

Clive: Okay, last question, are you and Lemmy really twins?

Iggy: No, Lemmy is older than me by a few years but he is my best friend so we might as well be twins as we do look alike. Well, that is, we used to look alike before I changed my appearance, but still, we do spend a lot of time together.

Clive: Well I'm afraid that's all we have time for, everyone. Thank you for your time, Iggy.

Iggy: It's been a pleasure. Now I'll take my leave.

Dr Eggman pulls out a remote and pushes a button, creating a small and very short earthquake. The Egg Dragoon lands behind The Big D. He gets in the cockpit.

Big D- Payback Time!

King Dedede- Oh...

Meta Knight- ... We're

Waddle Dee- ... Toast...

The Big D pushes a button and fires the electrified drill at the trio.

King Dedede, Meta Knight and Waddle Dee- BLAGIDYBLAGIDYBLAG!

Big D- End Transmission!

(WRITER'S NOTE- This Interview was made as a tribute to Sonic's 20th Birthday.)


End file.
